Well, I guess this is my first blog, I’ve never written one of these before so if I mess up, I’m sorry.
My blog will be about a variety of issues in my day to day life and my view on a certain subjects, such as “Depression” “Self Harm” “School”…the list could be endless.
But today, I want to talk about why I have started one…
Well it being gone 1am, I felt like I needed something to keep my mind occupied before I go completely insane and sleep deprived. I also thought that maybe it’d help me in a variety of ways to help me with my coping mechanisms and a place for me to rant (sorry if I do go on a bit, that’s just how I can be sometimes).
I know, I know, depressed teenage girl writing a blog about how depressing her life is etc etc. It’s so cliche I know but it does help to even write about some of the problems that you are facing, no matter how insignificant they are, they will always matter.
But honestly, how many of you reading this, have sat up in bed past 1 in the morning contemplating life? Deciding whether or not it is all worth it for the amount of pain you are going through….because I definitely know I have on more than one occasion. It’s not healthy, I am the first to admit that I have a problem and I know that it’s addicting. I also know how addicting things can get and how over the edge people can be. They suffer in silence, with the fake smiles and the long sleeves hiding secrets from those who are clueless of what lies beneath it. But, what are we so scared of?
Or maybe all three or some other reasons of your own that you’d rather keep to yourself. The biggest fear I have is all three, that is what I am scared of. The judgement from those within society, even though we are what they call Society. We created it, even just the smallest bit, but we blame it although we forget about what have created. It ugly! It’s horrible! It degrading!
Who decided that depression was a trend? That self injury was beautiful? That anxiety is cute? Too put one thing straight, they are far from it.
Two of them are forms of mental illness, and the other is a form of emotional pain so that those can feel (if that’s how you interpret it). Not something that should be pondered round as a great thing because those who suffer from it know how shameful it is and how shit it makes you feel! And no one should feel like that, but it’s society that does!
Society makes people feel so worthless because they have scars, can’t afford designer brands or because they are different from the rest. But who cares? No one should be treated different for any reason, not even if they are the biggest twat going, there has to be something that makes them a good person!
Til Next Time…Amber.