Lacking In Interest.

Today I decided to write about something different to what I normally write about, just because I fancied a change.
So today’s blog is about Passion. You win some and you lose some, it’s all apart of life. I certainly have lost interest in a number of things that I used to feel so passionate about but they have deteriorated, some for reasons unknown to myself. I used to have a passion for History. If you’ve known for me quite some time, you’d know how much I used to love history, it was something that I wanted to do in the future, something for me to sink my teeth into as it were. But now, I seem to have lost all interest in that. Well “all interest” is an exaggeration but to go from being so passionate about studying History and wanting to pursue a career in it, to just not wanting to find out more information about it, is a massive step back. A massive change of plan to my career because there’s no point in pursuing a career in something that you no longer feel passionate about.

When I started A Levels back in September I choose to take English Literature and I fell in love with the subject within a week of starting the course. Purely because it involved a number of things I enjoyed; reading, analyzing text and history (the historical context of a book such as 1984 or The Handmaid’s Tale.)  So that added another thing to the list of Things I Am Passionate about but after leaving Sixth Form, that vanished. Don’t get me wrong, I still love reading but I just lost interest in the parts of analyzing and finding out why the book was written and so on. I guess I just lost all passion after leaving school because I wasn’t well. I thought that there was no point in carrying on with something that I was Passionate about if I couldn’t cope with the work, if you get what I mean.

It’s like History, my dream is too study History at university in the next few years, to then go on to do bigger and brighter things that involve just that.Meaning I can just focus on my History degree and nothing else in the world but now I just don’t see the point. I feel like I’d just fail; as I started to fail it at school and then wouldn’t be able to cope with any of the things surrounding that subject.

But why is it that we lose passion in things we love? Why does that happen? Is it just that we are growing older or because someone tells us that “it’s pointless”.
Being passionate about something is great because you can talk about it for days on end and never get bored of talking about that one subject, but once you lose all faith in it, that all stops. You just don’t want to hear about it at all, it’s like you couldn’t careless about it. It’s shitty and annoying as you could have devoted your whole life to this one subject for it all to go to waste – if you look at it this way.

Take the advice I once got given; When you are passionate about something, don’t ever let go of it.

Till Next Time…Amber.


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